I hate myself

I don't know what has gotten into me.
I just think i lost control today.
I don't know why im so angry.
What is the point of being so angry when people don't even give a shit on what you're saying?
I must have looked scary back then.

Honestly i don't have the mood to tell joey the news.
But she is my best buddy.
I told her and congratulated anyway.
But i don't know why after seeing all those statuses on fb i just feel even down.
And i cried when i saw joey's comment.
It just happened so suddenly.
I really need time to calm myself.

I know ill feel nothing tomorrow.
But i feel like shit now.
Stayed back for four days straight and im tired and grumpy now.
Why everyone expects me to understand why they want to cheer so loudly?

I understand the reason but i just can't accept it.
I don't want to now.
Damn it